On the Wings of Iridescence
by jadeofspades
Summary: She was destined to become a beautiful artist and find the love of her life. She knew she'd end up happy. But after leaving to find the truth about who she is, Bella returns to Forks 10 years later as a completely different person, and everything has changed. With the help of Alice, will she learn how to be human again? Will she find the happiness that was written in her cards? AH


**Hi everyone! This is my first time ever writing on FF. I've been toying around with this idea in my head, so I decided to try it out and see what happens. As with most stories (at least the ones I've read), the first chapter is shorter than most others will be, and there are gaps in the ****information. Just wanted to let you know that I did that intentionally... anyway, let me know what you think of it. Hopefully it'll be worth continuing.**

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**"_I know what you're thinking. But darling, you're not thinking straight. Sadly, things just happen we can't explain." - Imogen Heap_**_  
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_ I blinked slowly, trying to figure out where I was. I recognized the house I grew up in, only it wasn't the same. The windows were somehow glowing and bulging out of their frames, but the walls and the front porch seemed to be drowning. There was no sky, only thick darkness around me that swallowed up everything. I took a step forward, even though I wasn't sure which direction I was going in. When my foot touched back on the ground, a cloud of brilliant, turquoise dust billowed out from underneath me. I felt myself smile, and I took another step, only to have a cloud of bright red blend with the turquoise. I continued to walk, mesmerized by the haze of colors that my footsteps seemed to generate. With every step, a new shade erupted from somewhere. The particles were clinging to my shirt, staining the material, and sticking to my skin. Everything seemed so familiar, like I'd been in this exact situation before, only I knew it couldn't be real. _

_ I broke into a run, suddenly desperate to see more of the blues and oranges. The dust was even coloring my hair now, but I didn't care. I didn't know where I was going, but it didn't matter. The faster I moved, the higher the colors billowed around me. I ran until they were all I could see; there was no more darkness around me. _

_ I slowed my pace, trying to understand what was happening. The only rational explanation I could find was that I must have been dreaming. Reaching out in front of me, I felt the fine dust land on my fingertips like soft sand. I rubbed them together and watched the powder smudge along my palms. I knew exactly what this was: _

_Sidewalk chalk. The epitome of my childhood; how I became an artist. _

_In that moment of recognition, I heard someone call my name. At first, the sound was gargled and warped, like maybe I'd imagined it, but then I heard it a second time. This time, the voice was crystal clear, and I knew instantly who was calling me. _

"_Bella?" _

_Edward. _

_I spun around desperately in the cloud of chalk, trying to find him. I moved forward, but more clouds billowed out from underneath me. Every time I moved, it only became harder to see, and I wished for the brightness to go away. _

"_Edward?" I called back, hoping he'd call my name again so I could find him. Instead, I felt his hand grasp mine and pull me towards him. In seconds, it was just the two of us standing in this skyless dream. Everything around us was gone. I looked down at my hands, one of which he was holding, and saw how different they looked from his. Edward's hands looked young, but felt strong, like they had when we were teenagers. Mine seemed older, and slightly worn. When I looked up, I felt relief in seeing his beautiful green eyes and messy, copper hair. But then I realized I was looking at the Edward I knew ten years ago, and I wasn't eighteen years old anymore. Not even in this dream._

_He looked at me, confused, and reached out to touch my face. I felt him touch me, but he was burning my cheek. He had a white, plastic band around his wrist. I looked closer at it, and realized it was a hospital admittance bracelet. Only it didn't say his name on it, it said someone else's. I gasped and tried to pull away from him, but he held onto my hand even tighter. _

"_What's wrong, Butterfly?" he asked, pulling me closer to him. All of the air in my body rushed out in a single breath, and my knees felt weak. _

"_What did you just call me?" I tried to say. No one was allowed to call me that. I wrenched my hand out of his and turned to run, but my body was stuck._

"_Where are you trying to go, Butterfly?"_

"Bella, wake up!"

Alice was sitting on the edge of the bed and shaking me. I opened my eyes and sat straight up, out of breath. I could still hear the echo of Edward's voice in my head. My hands started to tremble.

"What is it?" I asked, trying to act normal.

"Are you okay?" She looked at me questionably. I was sure I looked awful.

"I'm fine. Is something wrong?"

She gestured towards the ground, and I looked over the side of the mattress. The bedside lamp was shattered into pieces across the hardwood floor. "You knocked it over a few minutes ago, so I came in to check on you. Was it another nightmare?"

"I'm so sorry, Ali. I'll buy you a new one," I rushed out.

"I don't care about the lamp," she scowled. She gently picked up my hand and examined it. I hadn't realized it was bleeding. Then I noticed that I'd gotten blood on her down comforter.

"Shit," I sighed. "I'll buy you a new comforter too. I must have knocked my hand on the nightstand before I hit the lamp."

"I seriously don't care about the bedding right now," she snapped. "You need ice."

"It's just a scratch," I complained. "It'll be fine. I can't even feel it."

She glared at me. "You're getting some ice, whether you like it or not. Be careful around the glass." In the kitchen, she pressed an ice pack wrapped in a towel again my knuckles and instructed me to hold it there.

"So, what are we doing today?" I asked, cheerfully, trying to lighten up her mood.

"Bella, I think you should talk to my dad about getting you something to help you sleep," she said, seriously.

"What? Why?" I asked, appalled.

"Because you're not sleeping. If you aren't sitting up until three in the morning trying to fall asleep, you're having violent nightmares."

"That's not true," I argued, pathetically. She was right, though. I wasn't really sleeping, but I was used to it. I'd spent the last nine years never really getting sleep. I'd keep going until my body shut itself down for a few hours.

"Yes, it is. I hear you every night. You know my dad just wants to help you."

"I know," I mumbled.

"My mom and Rose are coming over today," she said. "They want to have another girls' day."

"Oh God," I wailed. "How many girls' days can we possibly have in two weeks!? What is there possibly left to do?"

Alice laughed and shook her head. "They've missed you," she explained. "I mean, it's only fair. You disappeared on them for almost ten years. They just want to make up for lost time. You were eighteen the last time they saw you, and now you're almost thirty. It's a huge adjustment for them."

"Alice Cullen, don't you dare lay the guilt trip on me. And we're the same age," I growled. Yet again, Alice was right. I'd left without giving anyone any warning. She was the only person who knew where I went and why aside from Charlie. Everyone had been nice enough about it when I just showed up one day, even though I knew they were all beyond pissed at me. Carlisle and Esme were like my second set of parents. Alice, Emmett and Rosalie were like my siblings. It was unacceptable for me to have gone off the way I did and to have stayed away for so long. At least, that was the way they saw it. They didn't know anything about the phone call I got that day. They knew nothing about the many lies my entire life had been based on.

"I'm sorry, I wasn't trying to make you feel bad," Alice said, putting her hand on my shoulder. "I don't know what to tell them, though, Bella. They aren't buying the whole 'art school' gimmick. You've been back for two weeks, and they're all coming up with these wild ass stories about why you really left, and I'm supposed to pretend like I don't know anything. My mom knows I'm lying though, so it's only a matter of time before she pounces."

"What have they come up with so far?" I asked, out of curiosity. I had to admit, the art school story was pretty bad. I hadn't even picked up a paintbrush in almost seven years.

"Well, the most popular one is that you got pregnant and ran away."

I burst out laughing and dropped the ice pack I'd been holding. "Are you kidding me?"

"Nope," she said, laughing as well. "They have no idea, Bells. Em and Rose don't know anything about Renee. It hasn't crossed my mom's mind yet, so you're still in the clear."

I thought about the dream I'd had and instantly remembered Edward. I wanted to ask about him, but Alice would see right through it. Edward knew bits and pieces about Renee...or at least, he knew she existed. Edward and I hadn't spoken a single word to each other since the day I left. I used to think about him every day, wanting nothing more than to call him, or email him, or even send him a pathetic text message. But whenever I seriously considered doing it, I remembered the last conversation we'd had, how the last words he said to me were like knives ripping through my soul. Edward Cullen may not have been the reason why I left, but he was certainly the reason why I hadn't come back until now. Every summer and holiday break, Edward would come to Forks and stay with Carlisle and Esme. They may have been his aunt and uncle, but they treated him like a son the same way they treated me like a daughter. When he was here, we were inseparable—I was drawn to him like he was a magnet. My magnet. Because he was Alice's cousin, I'd always kept what happened between me and a him a secret. It was the one thing I could never bring myself to tell her about. The funny thing was I didn't have to, really. She already knew, but she loved me enough to not say anything about it.

Later that day, when Esme had dragged all of us to mall in Port Angeles, I took the opportunity to stop at the Bed, Bath & Beyond to buy Alice and new set of matching lamps and a comforter. I was only living with her temporarily until I found a place of my own to live in. Despite the fact that I had more than enough money to buy any property in Forks, I was afraid to spend any of it. I still needed to buy a car, as well, but I had plenty of time.

Rosalie, as always, looked like a model while we wandered aimlessly between stores. She'd pulled her blonde curls into a messy bun and she _still_ looked like she belonged on a runway. The only difference between now and ten years ago was the giant rock she was sporting on her ring finger. She and Emmett had finally gotten married two years ago. Esme, apparently, had taken up Pilates, and looked amazing.

"I'm going to make you an appointment with my hairdresser," Esme said while we were sitting in the food court. Alice and Rosalie were picking at their salads, They looked confused look when she mentioned fixing my hair.

"Mom, I hate to be the one to point this out to you, but Bella doesn't have very much hair left," Rosalie said. She'd been finding subtle ways to show me just how angry she was by making comments about my appearance. She'd make jabs about how thin I was, or about my total lack of curves. I didn't mind, though. She had every right to be angry.

"Her hair is longer than mine, Rose," Alice spat.

"But not by much," she sneered. I rolled my eyes and went back to sipping my lemonade. I'd started keeping my hair short several years ago. Having hair as long as mine used to be was too much work.

"Your hair is adorable," Esme said, trying to sound reassuring. I knew she didn't like the change either. "I just think we could spice it up a little bit with some layers and maybe bangs. You could try a new color, too." I saw the excitement on her face, and I knew I couldn't say no to her setting up an appointment.

"Hmm, maybe I"ll go blonde," I said, sticking my tongue out at Rosalie. She narrowed her eyes at me and then started to giggle.

"Remember when we tried to dye your hair blonde when we were fourteen?" she asked. Esme sighed and put her head in her hands.

"That was awful," she sighed. "It was a nightmare trying to fix it after that."

I smiled at the memory. We'd damaged my hair so much that three inches had to be cut off. And Charlie was furious.

"Speaking of fake blondes, Irina keeps texting me," Rosalie said, setting her phone on the table. It buzzed twice and the screen flashed.

"What does she want?" Alice asked, scrunching up her face.

"Who cares?" Rosalie grumbled. I wanted to know who this Irina was, but something kept me from asking.

"She probably wants to go dress shopping," Esme said. "She mentioned that last time I saw her."

"Are you kidding me!? That dumb bitch is probably going to buy a skin-tight dress designed to show off that Russian body of hers. And then she wont fit into it in two months!" Rosalie shrieked. "Sorry, Mom..." she said, apologizing for her language.

"Well, either way, Edward said he might be stopping by this weekend," Esme said, rummaging through her purse until she pulled out her phone. She tapped out a text message and set her phone next to Rosalie's.

"Irina is Edward's fiancee," Alice said, nudging me. My head snapped up.

"I'm sorry?" I asked, hoping I misheard her. Alice put her hand on my knee under the table.

"You can hardly call her that," Rosalie said, scoffing. "We all know he's only marrying her because he knocked her up." Then she caught Esme's eye. "Sorry...again."

"Well, it's true," Esme said. "I don't know what he'd see in her otherwise. But Edward is doing the right thing, and we're going to support him through it. Right?"

"Of course, Mom," Alice said. The lemonade I'd been drinking suddenly felt like acid in my stomach.

"Bella, you'll come over for dinner tonight, won't you?" Esme asked. She'd been feeding me constantly, hoping she could make me gain weight. I took a minute to answer her. It was Friday, and she said Edward might stop by on the weekend. Friday didn't count, did it? I decided it didn't and that I'd just stay away from the Cullen's on Saturday and Sunday.

"Sure," I said. "You don't have plans, do you?" I asked Alice.

"No, I don't. We'll be there for dinner," she promised.

We drove back home, and before separating, Esme promised she'd make me a hair appointment for sometime next week. Once inside the safety of Alice's apartment, I felt the weight of the day fully hit me. I collapsed onto the sofa and tried to relax enough for my heart palpitations to stop. The good thing about living with Alice was that I didn't have to pretend when I was around her. I didn't have to act like I was okay, or like my entire life wasn't a mess. She'd been there for me since the beginning. We both did our best to take care of each other. While I was in Los Angeles dealing with my sick mother, she was the one who called every day to remind me to eat and take a shower. When her relationship with Jasper crumbled, I was the one who called her every night just to listen to her cry. I even flew her out to LA to stay with with me for a while. She told everyone else she was going to New York for some shopping therapy. Thankfully, the gift shops around Beverly Hills had New York snow globes, so she bought one and gave it to Carlisle and Esme as a souvenir.

"Alice, you don't think he'll be there tonight, do you?" I asked, in a small voice. She'd been digging through her closet, but she heard me and walked into the living room.

"I doubt it, sweetie," she said, sitting down and letting me put my head in her lap. She ran her fingers through my hair. "Are you ever going to tell me what happened with him?"

I didn't really know what to tell her. I had so much to say, so many different explanations, and yet, Edward and I were never anything together. How was I supposed to tell her that he broke my heart? How was I supposed to tell her that he'd permanently damaged it? I felt a thousand words bubble up in my throat, all of them begging to be let out. But only six made it out.

"I was in love with him."

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Alice made me change before went over to her parents' house. She'd disapproved of the outfit I wore to the mall, and refused to let me go out again dressed like a bum, as she had described it.

"I don't understand you, sometimes. If you're going to slouch around in jeans, at least wear designer. None of this Levi's crap. We both know you can afford them," she scowled while pulling clothes out of my suitcases. "And for the love of God, put your clothes on hangers. They've been shoved in these bags for long enough."

I pulled open the one suitcase she hadn't gone through and laid it open on the bed. I'd given up and decided to let her go through the one piece of luggage I'd told her was off-limits. She assumed it was because I'd packed some of Renee's things in there, things with sentimental value.

When she saw what was really inside, she shrieked. "What the hell!? Bella! How could you not tell me you have a suitcase filled with designer clothes? Better yet, how could you leave them shoved in there? Have you no decency?"

"I brought them because I knew business would eventually catch up to me, and I know my Levi's aren't acceptable for executive meetings," I said, bluntly. "You can have whatever you want, by the way." The number of dresses, fancy blouses, and pencil skirts I had in there was disgusting. The many pairs of shoes I had were even worse.

When we pulled into her parents driveway, Alice was still sulking about the clothes. "Seriously, Ali? I'll take you to Seattle, or anywhere you want, and I'll get you a new wardrobe. It'll go on the company card, okay?" I asked, trying to make her smile. It worked. Her face lit up like a light bulb.

"Yes!" she exclaimed. "The pouting totally worked," she said, grinning maniacally. I couldn't help but laugh at how twisted she was. She pushed open the front door and we walked into the house, still laughing together.

I moved down the hall towards the kitchen, and in seconds, my breath was cut off. My laughter died instantly, and I couldn't even think, when I rounded the corner and met the startled, angry eyes of Edward Cullen.

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**Well, how was it? Good? Bad? I'm warning people now, Bella didn't get pregnant and run away...nor will she. Not very much in this story is cliche...I think. Things might seem a little bit confusing, but I promise, they'll all start to come together. You'll eventually find out where she went, why she left, what happened while she was gone, what an ass Edward can be, and all of that fun stuff. This is rated M for language, situations, and others reasons that will become obvious later on. You're all wonderful for even making it this far into the story! Feel free to review or PM me if you have any questions or feedback. **

**Much love, **

**Jade**


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